I am in a reflective mood today. At this moment I am sick,
very sick as faith may have it. I am not dying and I am not in some tragic French
art film. My MS just exploded and it got its nastiness all over me. The
nastiness I hard to get out of your hair and you should see my curtains!
I have had an intense amount of stress since August. A job
that sucked my life away from me leads me to get a new job (yay). I loved this
new job and my stress level was going down, but now with a merger, layoffs, and
frustrated bosses taking their stress out with yelling, my awesome MS bubble
popped.
I picture it like a water balloon dangling over my head and
then one day the weight is so much it just explodes. Eye jumping, pain, muscle
spasms, and fatigue came with this little explosion. I’m not having new
symptoms so it’s probably not a flare. My doctor agrees that the intense amount
of stress I have been under has probably caused my body to finally call uncle.
Do you know what though? I’m ok with that. I’m not mad,
upset, or emotionally losing it. I think this is because I have an awesome
support system with some awesome friends and that I have my soul back. I feel
yucky and I want to sleep all the time which could be the fatigue but probably
also the muscle relaxers, but I am good.
Maybe next week I’ll be annoyed or sad that I’m sick again
but maybe not. I really enjoy my life and the challenges I face with it. If I didn't have things happening in my life it would be rather boring now wouldn’t
it (smile)?
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